Slow and Steady...

Happy April! I'm thinking a post a month is what I'm capable of, unless I'm truly inspired or truly motivated (right now, motivation is the key). I named this post slow and steady because that's what my weight loss has been. For the past 2 weeks, I have lost 0.4 pounds. Now I know any loss is a good thing, but come on. I can't figure out why I can't lose a whole pound in one week. So I have to re-evaluate what I am doing and figure out where I am going wrong. I am still writing down everything I eat and I am doing my best to make good choices (although the other night I went to dinner with a friend and ate a burger). For the most part, I feel pretty good about what I'm eating. I have started buying more organic foods and looking at the labels of items in the grocery store before I buy them. I have been staying away from processed foods, which have a lot of chemicals in them in exchange for more produce and healthier meats. I am also cooking more, which I really enjoy, and choosing recipes that have more vegetables in them. I am still struggling with my alcohol consumption. I work the overnight shift, so 5 days a week I am not drinking at all, but on my days off I seem to drink a lot. I don't know, I try to have the best intentions, but instead of having 1-2 glasses of wine or 1-2 beers, I seem to drink 6-7. At 5 points a glass, that 30-35 points for that much wine. (Light beer is a little less at 3 points, but it still adds up) I'm beginning to wonder if it's worth it. Also, when I drink like that, I wake up feeling crappy and unmotivated to do anything which is not how I want to spend my day off. I don't want to give up drinking wine or beer. I enjoy having a glass of wine with dinner and I didn't go into this to give up alcohol. I think I just need to be very mindful about how much I am drinking. If I plan for 1-2 glasses of wine, that is all I should drink. As I was writing this, I began to think about my sense of control or lack there of. When I think about how I put on this weight and how I've maintained this weight for so long I realize that my biggest issue has always been a lack of control. I love sweets, but instead of just eating one cookie or 2 small scoops of ice cream, I have always had to have 3-4 cookies or a huge bowl of ice cream. Also, once I start eating sweets, especially if I am alone, I can't seem to stop. I think the same is true for alcohol. The feeling that I get when I eat sweets or consume alcohol are the same. It is a sense of euphoria, nothing seems to bother me and I feel like I'm wrapped in a nice, warm cocoon. I can understand why some people self-medicate with alcohol or even food. The problem is, like with most things, too much is not good. So my focus is going to be on self-control. If I can learn to control how much of a good thing I am putting into my body, it will spill over into other aspects of my life that I have let go. It won't be an easy process, but nothing really worth doing ever is. After all, this is my life and, if I'm not happy about how I'm looking or how things are going, I am the one who has to fix it. So, thank you to everyone who take the time to read this. I appreciate all of the comments and encouragements I've received. I will continue to keep you posted on how things are going. Oh, and in case you were wondering, at my last weigh in I was 262.8 pounds, down 7.2 pounds from my beginning. Not too shabby... :)